Breastfeeding vs. Formula Feeding: Impact on Mother-Child Relationship 

Emotional Closeness (Mother-Baby Bonding)

Breastfeeding often helps moms and babies feel close. When a mom breastfeeds, her body releases oxytocin, also known as the "bonding hormone." This hormone plays a big role in helping both the mom and the baby feel calm, connected, and trusting toward each other.

Skin-to-skin contact during breastfeeding also helps the baby feel warm, safe, and loved. Studies show that breastfeeding moms often engage in more eye contact, gentle touch, and sensitive responses to their babies compared to moms who formula feed.

In fact, brain imaging studies show that breastfeeding moms' brains light up more in emotional areas when they hear their babies cry. This suggests that breastfeeding can increase a mom’s emotional responsiveness.

However, breastfeeding is not the only path to creating emotional closeness.

A study of 271 mothers using the Postpartum Bonding Questionnaire found no major difference in how bonded moms felt to their babies, whether they breastfed or formula-fed.

The key factor for strong bonding wasn’t the feeding method—it was the mother's warmth, responsiveness, and emotional availability. Loving and attentive care matters most.

Many formula-feeding moms bond deeply with their babies through cuddling, skin-to-skin time, and sensitive caregiving.

In short, breastfeeding may provide a helpful boost for bonding, but it is not necessary for a strong emotional connection.

Infant Attachment Security

"Attachment security" is a term used by psychologists to describe how safe and connected a baby feels with their primary caregiver. Babies who are securely attached feel confident exploring the world because they know they have a trusted adult to return to when needed. So, does breastfeeding help create secure attachment?

Research shows that sensitive caregiving—being responsive, warm, and predictable—is what truly builds secure attachment. In one study, a mom’s ability to read and respond to her baby's cues at 3 months of age was a stronger predictor of secure attachment at 12 months than whether she breastfed.

However, some studies suggest that breastfeeding may offer a slight advantage. Babies who were breastfed longer tended to have more secure attachments and fewer signs of disorganized attachment at 14 months. Disorganized attachment is a risk factor for later emotional struggles, so reducing it is important.

Still, experts caution that these findings don’t mean breastfeeding directly causes secure attachment. Mothers who are naturally more sensitive and tuned-in may be both more likely to breastfeed and to foster secure attachment, making sensitivity—not breastfeeding—the real driver.

Also, mothers with secure adult attachment styles (those comfortable with closeness and trusting relationships) are more likely to breastfeed. In this way, personal traits, not just breastfeeding itself, influence attachment.

In summary, breastfeeding can slightly support secure attachment, but it is neither required nor a guarantee. Formula-fed babies who experience consistent, loving care are just as capable of developing strong, secure attachments.

Long-Term Parent-Child Relationship Quality

Some researchers have looked at whether the early experience of breastfeeding has lasting effects on the parent-child relationship years later.

Does breastfeeding lead to a stronger emotional bond when the child is older?

Some studies show positive signs. For example, moms who breastfed longer were found to be more sensitive and warm in their interactions with their children even up to 11 years of age. Breastfeeding may help moms develop habits of closeness, touch, and responsiveness that continue into later childhood.

However, other large, high-quality studies tell a different story. The PROBIT study, one of the biggest randomized breastfeeding studies ever done, followed over 13,000 mother-child pairs.

Researchers found no major differences in how satisfied moms were with their relationship with their child at age 6.5, whether they breastfed or formula-fed. Children’s emotional and behavior scores were also very similar between groups.

This shows that many factors influence the parent-child relationship over time. Parenting style, communication, emotional support, family stress, school experiences, and the child’s unique personality all have a huge impact as children grow older. Breastfeeding might offer a positive start, but it is just one small piece of the puzzle.

The good news is that parents can build a strong, lasting bond with their child through love, patience, understanding, and open communication—no matter how they fed their baby in infancy.

Conclusion: What Really Matters

Breastfeeding can help with early bonding and may slightly support secure attachment. It might even have small positive effects on how warm and sensitive a mother remains as the child grows. But overall, breastfeeding is not essential for building a strong and healthy parent-child relationship.

The biggest factors that help babies and children thrive emotionally are:

• Responding promptly and warmly to their needs

• Providing comfort, eye contact, and physical closeness

• Being emotionally available and consistent

• Encouraging exploration while being a safe base

Whether you breastfeed, formula-feed, or do a mix of both, the most important thing is showing love, care, and responsiveness. Parents who connect emotionally, support their child's needs, and build trust create strong, loving relationships that last a lifetime.

In short: It’s not about the milk. It’s about the moments.

Sources:

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2. Kim, P., Feldman, R., Mayes, L. C., Eicher, V., Thompson, N., & Leckman, J. F. (2011). Breastfeeding, brain activation to own infant cry, and maternal sensitivity. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 52(8), 907-915. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1469-7610.2011.02406.x

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8. Nishioka, E., Haruna, M., Ota, E., Matsuzaki, M., Murayama, R., & Murashima, S. (2011). A prospective study of the relationship between breastfeeding and maternal attachment. Journal of Advanced Nursing, 68(10), 2212-2220. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1365-2648.2011.05905.x

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Notes:

• The PROBIT study (by Kramer et al.) is the most important because it's the largest randomized controlled trial in this area.